the prettiest star

Laugh now, but one day we'll be in charge.

Sunday, June 26


So for a week now, I have sat down at the computer many, many times, hands poised over the computer to try and describe what happened to me last weekend on my date.

Sadly, words fail me, so there's only one way to put it.

It was complete and utter torture.

It may well have put me off dating for a very long time.

Saturday, June 18


So as soon as I decide to start regular blogging, I am exiled to the land of No Internet Access. Argh! It's all fixed now anyway.

It's 2am, and I've just got back from work (pub) and, eeeeeeee, I have a date tomorrow!

This guy I'd never seen before was giving me looks while I was working, so I mentioned this to the boss, adding that I thought he was a bit phwoar. So he took it upon himself to set up a date- I could have died from embarrasment- but this guy is cute and lovely.

So tomorrow, please send me good vibes!

Thursday, June 16

I got my groove back.

It's been a while hasn't it?

So, during this little blog holiday, I've been really busy. I'm working here, and at my local, I'm really busting my arse at the gym, and I feel really sorted out, financially, mentally, and physically.

I have money, for once, and I actually really enjoy both my jobs. I go to the gym every other day and I'm discovering all these new muscles, I feel great.

So, now that I am 'sorted' as it were, you can take this as my official return to daily blogging. The past two weeks at home, I've felt like I have nothing to say. I was unemployed and between semesters, there wasn't really much going on with me, and my head was really just a bit empty.

I still don't have anything resembling a man, but I'm working on it.

Wednesday, June 8

Sorry, but...

I've been completely shit at posting of late haven't I?

Truth is, since Monday, I've been really busy. And when I say busy, I mean productive busy, not pissing about doing fuck all busy. I've got a job in a pub- making that 2 jobs in total, and I started that this week. It was also my friend's birthday. I've read 5 books in two days and there is one other thing.

The gym. I actually booked a one to one with a trainer, Sam, that I wasn't in love with, to get a program that is really challanging. So, I turned up on time and my favourite trainer- Ashley- who is possibly the most beautiful human being alive- said he'd be doing my program because Sam was ill.

Then the doom took over me. Ashley is the one my Mum calls 'the nasty one' because apparantly he really pushes people and has been known to make people cry. But I was brave. Internally, I knew that it was EXACTLY my luck for this to happen, but I also realised this might actually be a good thing for me.

So I told him about how I had returned to uni in May, and drank more in a month than many people will ever drink in their entire lives, and then became realy unfit because I was too hungover to do anything. I told him that I actually intended to go to the gym and work out, that I didn't want to be like those women who turn up in a push up bra and make up and do yoga in the weights room in a sad attempt to pull.

It started off just fine. We did all my cardio and chatted about uni, school, places to go out in Nottingham. I spoke about the overwhelming stupidosity of men these days, and he accused me of being picky. Of course I'm picky! If I wasn't I would end up with one of the men from Saturday night. Most had their shirts tucked in (big mistake) and had completely tragic hair. Well sorry. I'm going to be picky and I'm going to like it.

So back to the story. We moved to the weights, and foolishly, by then, I'd been fooled into thinking he was a nice person. So first machine was the leg press, which I normally do about 60-70kg on- I was told to lift my own body weight on this one. Well he told me that wasn't good enough and kept putting it up until we got to 110kg. It was like lifting my father! I was making sex faces. After that, there were many horribly heavy weights he made me do, and I was actually quite scared at how much I can lift when I try. Then he told me we'd run out of time and could come back at 10am tomorrow?

So 10am yesterday, earliest I've been up for about a year, I turned up, to do my arms and abs. This time, he underestimated how strong I am. Setting all the weights way lower than I normally do, he kept putting them up, and then pulling some odd faces. He said he didn't know many girls this strong- I felt so proud- then realised this makes me a total manbian. Who finds 'I am freakishly strong!' attractive?

Then we had a little argument over music- I won't go into it, but he did tell me to buy an mp3 player, and set me some impossibly difficult ab exercises. Then, made me make an appointment for 3 weeks time for a review. He asked me if I intended to stick to it- frankly, I'm too afraid not to. So I returned to the gym today, and had to find him having forgotten how to use ALL the machines.'I thought you'd forget' he said. Tosser. He wasn't even impressed that I had bought an mp3 player that very day!

Speaking of mp3 players, for all my love of music, I am shockingly behind in devices to play it. I've only been downloading music for about a year, my car still has no 'sound system' to speak of, and I have only owned an mp3 for a day. I always said, when I could afford it, I'd get a CD player and proper speakers in my car- but that day never came. But I bought a really cheap mp3 player- only £40. So instead of having the gym's completly shit dance music, I now have a proper soundtrack.

For cardio, it's Mylo, Prodigy, Basement Jaxx and a bit of garage. Then I have rnb music by female artists for when I do other stuff- see, when I think I've done enough, I'll be reminded that JLo, Ciara, and the rest have really good bodies and that motivates me!

So I may not be posting much in the next couple of weeks, I need to kick my arse into shape. To be honest, between working two jobs (I'm doing 50 hours a week, eek!) and brutal new gym program, and of course, going out, I'm too tired to even go shopping. But it's good for me, and once I look gorgeous (we hope) I will return to posting all the time. Okay?

Sunday, June 5


Home has been an interesting experience so far. Sadly Big Brother 6 is taking up alarming chunks of my time- I love Saskia. Aside from that, I wandered half dressed in the rain while my car had an MOT, I witnessed my father's girlfriend destroy some perfetly good veggies, and I resumed The Plan.

I also got accosted by a group of middle aged men. No, scrap that. They were old. I was accosted by a group of old men last night. Me and Rachel were clearly having a conversation, and were not giving anyone the eye, the come on, or any 'signals'. Yet we were propositioned by a harem of office workers on night release, who promised a night of 'hotness'. I told Mr Hotness, that seeing as I was only 19, and he is what, about 90?, that a night of geriatric love was about as appealing as a long cold drink of battery acid. I said should our quest for a fit young thing fall through, I'd be in touch, but that frankly there was more chance of me beating myself to death with an old shoe.

Honestly, why do they bother? Personally, I wouldn't date anyone older than around 24, I just don't do older guys. Perhaps I should put it on a t-shirt? 'If there's a chance you could have fathered me, then please piss off- this girl buys her own drinks, drives her own car, pays her own bills'.

My mother and her complete loon of a boyfriend woke me up at 8am this morning by playing some loud Spanish folk music. I opened my bedroom door and made some incoherable noise about it being the middle of the night, etc, only to be met by a barrage of Spanish abuse. Someone's going to get hurt....

PJ passed this to me. Do go and read his blog, he, like most British people, is super cool.

Estimate the total number of books you’ve ever owned in your life?
Oh crap, about 500.

What’s the last book you bought?
On Friday I bought Bridget Jones, The Edge of Reason, by Helen Fielding; Divine Secrets of the Ya Ya Sisterhood, by Rebecca Wells; and House of The Spirits by Isabel Allende.

What’s the last book you read?
I finished Divine Secrets this morning. Absolutely amazing book.

List 5 books that mean a lot to you.

1.The Buddha Of Suburbia by Hanif Kureishi
- An ex gave me this, and my copy is so battered and worn, it's my favourite book. The protagonist, Karim, has one British parent, and one foreign parent, and a younger brother. His Dad leaves for another woman, and Karim has to deal with a lot of shit. It's so funny, and the family is just like mine, it helped me so much to cope with my parents, and their divorce and everything. I read this book all the time and never get bored of it.
2.White Teeth by Zadie Smith- This is also about mixing cultures, and I love all the different stories and time periods in it. It's such a funny book with some amazing characters in it.

3.Oranges Are Not The Only Fruit by Jeanette Winterson- Part of my love for this book stems from the fact that it's set in the north, and I love northern humour. The things it exposes about religion are extremely revealing, and the fact that I don't believe in religion helped me identify with it.

4.The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath- I did an essay on this, and compared it to Oranges, above. A very powerful book.

5.One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez- I think this is the most beautifully written book I've ever read. It covers so much and yet I found every bit incredibly interesting. It's a little bit of Colombian history, and there are a lot of characters, but they remind me of my mother's family.

I know, I'm supposed to pass this on, but just anyone who feels like doing it, do it.